hay.. can't believe this work week..
i fell on my ass yesterday(tuesday)... tripped 3 steps down .. stupid stairs!! i tell you it happens to be in my top 10 hated things in the world. the pain started only this morning, i didn't put too much thought yesterday when i saw my shoe heel flying ahead of me. I just got those shoes.. my hubby just got those for me... buMmEr!! now i havta wear the already foresaken pairs...aaaahhhhg the misery!
I went around QC with Wene the slut for half a day, we screened around 50 trainees from the TESDA free thing. 1st batch was horrible.. i don't want to illustrate how much our country should take this matter seriously,, giving out free trainings is a good start, i wish they look into integrating more efficient programs in the educational system.
I had dinner with the boys, pigged out. i had myself grilled veggie penne, nachos, a couple of cocktails and fuckn choco parafait!! VERRRY BADDDD! i stuffed my face bloated as i watched the boys become more and more opinionated by every bottle they chug down.
i'm not too hyped for tomorrow even if i was harassed today by a client who's too weird to even explain properly what he needs!
>>already tomorrow. SEE i'm so psychic when it comes to mess ups... fuckn client didn't show up. i was expecting the other way around, my people texting or calling in sick or whachubeber family emergencies and i end up with ZERO SHOWS! i want to blow the whole building up! fock!!<<
work work.. wish i had a life other than work!
29.11.06
22.11.06
swingin'
twas my hubby's 28th burstday yesterday and we celebrated in advance putting his and my daughter's party on one packed saturday evening.
i got up fairly early from a late night-early morning gimik with mah sistahs and tot, we went to the grocery, as in the whole block with jojo the mongo..my loving yaya net and mag bounzin bebe girl... ang saya!!
so i started cooking at around 4:30 even texted my friends halfway not to be punctual since im running late on schedule. I had to go double time when my 1st pair of visitors came.. aiko and jamie to put sincere judgement on what i have for the night .. well so far so good even if they only got to have the double sauced meatball pasta. ^_^
triple timing already when the Turbulence boys paid us a surprise visit.. hehe.. ny that time i was laready finishing my last dish, then my sistahs with joods came with the sisig!!! wooohooweeee! then my cousins with mah sister and dad.. we started devouring my soul food at around 9.. hehehe...
here's the thing... i love cooking more so cooking for people i love. I can bitch em around most of the days but one of the voodoos that i do would come in the form of the treats i conjoured up for you.
I'm not malambing, i am showy when i want to get on someone's nerve or i know that this person is too easy to make bola so i could get him to do what i want. But when i decide to cook for you, that means you are special enough that iL risk ruining my nails for u, tolerating the smell of garlic on my fingers for days after, exploring new flavors and guessing if this is in sync with YOU!
Artists write songs, or dance to really cheesy love songs. Authors have em in novels, poetry or prose.... While Ruthie has it served steamin hot, delightful desserts or simply mixed to knock you out....second..third servings allowed.
i got up fairly early from a late night-early morning gimik with mah sistahs and tot, we went to the grocery, as in the whole block with jojo the mongo..my loving yaya net and mag bounzin bebe girl... ang saya!!
so i started cooking at around 4:30 even texted my friends halfway not to be punctual since im running late on schedule. I had to go double time when my 1st pair of visitors came.. aiko and jamie to put sincere judgement on what i have for the night .. well so far so good even if they only got to have the double sauced meatball pasta. ^_^
triple timing already when the Turbulence boys paid us a surprise visit.. hehe.. ny that time i was laready finishing my last dish, then my sistahs with joods came with the sisig!!! wooohooweeee! then my cousins with mah sister and dad.. we started devouring my soul food at around 9.. hehehe...
here's the thing... i love cooking more so cooking for people i love. I can bitch em around most of the days but one of the voodoos that i do would come in the form of the treats i conjoured up for you.
I'm not malambing, i am showy when i want to get on someone's nerve or i know that this person is too easy to make bola so i could get him to do what i want. But when i decide to cook for you, that means you are special enough that iL risk ruining my nails for u, tolerating the smell of garlic on my fingers for days after, exploring new flavors and guessing if this is in sync with YOU!
Artists write songs, or dance to really cheesy love songs. Authors have em in novels, poetry or prose.... While Ruthie has it served steamin hot, delightful desserts or simply mixed to knock you out....second..third servings allowed.
my sistahs and I with joods had the usual treats, we tagged along chano with us as our special guest.... we went swingin..
u must love how it takes you back to the time where you ddnt give an F about anything, the time when scabs on your knees would mean you have a great social life, when sago't gulaman is waaaaaaaaay better than starbucks ...when you would wait till the cheese coats your fingers for a few centimeters before you delightfully like each of em clean... when the greatest problem that u had would be the homework that u left undone because u just cannot be out in the streets and not be playing patintero/chinese garter/cos and robbers with teh other kids from the block.
you see this is why some people choose not to grow up.
can i just not care about not being adult enough in living my OWN life?
14.11.06
lumpy...
i have noticed that i am having too much of a feeble mind lately.
Like last night, having parted ways with mah sistahz after a mall stroll Ed was sooo hyped up to a rant by starvation! hahaha (extreme na ito e) so we end up bickering about me wanting to go back and eat dinner with the sistahz while we get lost somewhere in green meadows. (nice!)
and then just today, I have set an interview with one of my candidates for the nth time when i decide to call in a raincheck.
im too lazy.
I have refreshed my shallowness...one of my avid texter has been sending me hardcore nonsense... and i wish he send more! i'm too shallow, that i had this blog on draft for over 4 days now and i can't bring myself to put it together like i use to.
Usually, when i save postings on draft i would get back to it because iL get a lightbuld idea and i repeat it to myself until i jot it down until i have a good sound one.
i'M burning.
iL end this blog with a favor to ask from whoever takes interest in reading my non-sense. My friend's 5-month old daughter just died, please say a short prayer for Blesilda Starla Mane. (and the parents)
ciao!
Like last night, having parted ways with mah sistahz after a mall stroll Ed was sooo hyped up to a rant by starvation! hahaha (extreme na ito e) so we end up bickering about me wanting to go back and eat dinner with the sistahz while we get lost somewhere in green meadows. (nice!)
and then just today, I have set an interview with one of my candidates for the nth time when i decide to call in a raincheck.
im too lazy.
I have refreshed my shallowness...one of my avid texter has been sending me hardcore nonsense... and i wish he send more! i'm too shallow, that i had this blog on draft for over 4 days now and i can't bring myself to put it together like i use to.
Usually, when i save postings on draft i would get back to it because iL get a lightbuld idea and i repeat it to myself until i jot it down until i have a good sound one.
i'M burning.
iL end this blog with a favor to ask from whoever takes interest in reading my non-sense. My friend's 5-month old daughter just died, please say a short prayer for Blesilda Starla Mane. (and the parents)
ciao!
10.11.06
pretend!!
hahahaha...
i told the ice tray to pretend that i filled it with water as i put it back inside the freezer.
how come no one is daring enough to chug down half cup of dijoun musturd-mayo dip?
fidgetty friday fever!!
bye friends!
i told the ice tray to pretend that i filled it with water as i put it back inside the freezer.
how come no one is daring enough to chug down half cup of dijoun musturd-mayo dip?
fidgetty friday fever!!
bye friends!
9.11.06
Ruthie 8/30/2004 wrote some more:
Seven Thousand Six Hundred Sixty-One Sunshines
Seven Thousand Six Hundred Sixty-One Sunshines Friends and family.. readers who found the time to get a glimpse of th 7661st day of mah freakin' life... Aloha! I could not think of any descent title.. so i decided on the sunshines i admired, loathed, ignored and even missed for my entire life. and that is 7552 sunshines up to date.. the number seems small to me.. i was expecting somthing around a million... because it sure feels that i have spent more than several thounsand days..oh well...as much as i am frustrated.. i found this fact to be evidence of my young age (naks!!) ... nevertheless i can't deny the fact that i feel that i have spent more than these days if based from the challenges that i dealt with..and dealing with.. the trouble i got myself into and out of.. those i got away from.. i can't helped but be swallowed by awe by the mere fact that i'm still standing.. and asking for more.. (challenges more than trouble..good girl ako e.. ). My life has always been an open book to people who took the liberty of making me a part of theirs. Journalizing my daily life would not be any different from my ritual of boring them with my stories and also help me to be aware of the REAL number of sunshines came upon my life and the sunsets iL be ever thankful for, for the purple stars and orange gaze that soothes the exhaustion from the day's encounterSo to all of you.. thanks for watching my back and taking some of my shit.. special thanks to aiko and sarah for the BLOG influence... much love and i'm terribly missing u guys..
Seven Thousand Six Hundred Sixty-One Sunshines Friends and family.. readers who found the time to get a glimpse of th 7661st day of mah freakin' life... Aloha! I could not think of any descent title.. so i decided on the sunshines i admired, loathed, ignored and even missed for my entire life. and that is 7552 sunshines up to date.. the number seems small to me.. i was expecting somthing around a million... because it sure feels that i have spent more than several thounsand days..oh well...as much as i am frustrated.. i found this fact to be evidence of my young age (naks!!) ... nevertheless i can't deny the fact that i feel that i have spent more than these days if based from the challenges that i dealt with..and dealing with.. the trouble i got myself into and out of.. those i got away from.. i can't helped but be swallowed by awe by the mere fact that i'm still standing.. and asking for more.. (challenges more than trouble..good girl ako e.. ). My life has always been an open book to people who took the liberty of making me a part of theirs. Journalizing my daily life would not be any different from my ritual of boring them with my stories and also help me to be aware of the REAL number of sunshines came upon my life and the sunsets iL be ever thankful for, for the purple stars and orange gaze that soothes the exhaustion from the day's encounterSo to all of you.. thanks for watching my back and taking some of my shit.. special thanks to aiko and sarah for the BLOG influence... much love and i'm terribly missing u guys..
Ruthie 8/30/2004 wrote
Barely grown up...
Realizing that you are actually an adult.. (naks!) is so far different from accepting it… graduation …earning a degree… serve as a mere benchmark but the rights of passage comes when you are faced with choices that may concern budgeting your monthly wage and actually compromising the gimmick money … which you usually save for … for the month’s rent. As of the moment this reality seems to be a really hostile dream that I have to wake up to… but then again… the only thing I have to do is really step inside the box and actually accept that I’m no floating entity that can solve life’s problem outside the box… I also have to be inside the box to truly understand and solve the problem. Several months ago, I was so delighted because I finally made up a definite career path that I would trod in few months time… I felt so matured… (bibbo ko!! Syeeeet!) with this clear path in mind… completing my requirements for graduation was like carrying a torch so proud, graceful and with all dignity trotting to that big ‘ol lamp that needed to be lit to start the whole ceremony… in my case starting a life of my own. Independence is only around the corner. Comes April… while I was carefree looking for a job, the One Almighty decided to trot with me in my path. He gave me a little extra to …let’s just say… make thing a bit more challenging. I learned that I was 8 weeks pregnant, and that whoozy early mornings was actually morning sickness. Fear, frustration, and hopelessness filled my fighter soul. I frantically psyched myself, I MUST keep myself together. (kaya todo text and press release ako… hahaha) Then again God worked mysteriously to lift those negative emotions and thoughts. Friends were shocked but yet very much excited. Their reactions made me sigh in relief, gave me instant booze that I will never go solo flight in this challenge. A split second after sighing, a began to panic once again. How the hell will I put into words my situation and confess to my dad. After all his sacrifices, his dedication to raise us up as adults single handedly. I know this was one that I can never get away with, so with all courage I texted my oldest brother. He bombarded me with questions, no doubt he was shocked but amidst the anxiety that filled the both of us, for the first time in our entire life I felt that he truly cared for me as a little sister. Of course I was not spared from the sermon but more than that I was so grateful that I was able to tell someone inside the family and much better I was not rejected. Phew! I was never the person who plans ahead…actually I hated being bothered by things that are yet to come.. pondering on such things was a waste of time… I live my life one day at a time… I am grateful for the past and try with all my might to free myself from regrets and grudges… it’s the present that matters. All these were changed when I recognized my situation... i saw myself living des'ree's song... I gotta be bold.. i gotta be bad.. i gotta be wiser.. i gotta be hard.. i gotta be tough.. i gotta be stronger.. still gotta be cool.. gotta be calm.. and very much gotta stay together... who knows... Love might reallly save the day.. Life's a bitch.. but it aint gonna bitch a bitch around.. keepin it real!
Realizing that you are actually an adult.. (naks!) is so far different from accepting it… graduation …earning a degree… serve as a mere benchmark but the rights of passage comes when you are faced with choices that may concern budgeting your monthly wage and actually compromising the gimmick money … which you usually save for … for the month’s rent. As of the moment this reality seems to be a really hostile dream that I have to wake up to… but then again… the only thing I have to do is really step inside the box and actually accept that I’m no floating entity that can solve life’s problem outside the box… I also have to be inside the box to truly understand and solve the problem. Several months ago, I was so delighted because I finally made up a definite career path that I would trod in few months time… I felt so matured… (bibbo ko!! Syeeeet!) with this clear path in mind… completing my requirements for graduation was like carrying a torch so proud, graceful and with all dignity trotting to that big ‘ol lamp that needed to be lit to start the whole ceremony… in my case starting a life of my own. Independence is only around the corner. Comes April… while I was carefree looking for a job, the One Almighty decided to trot with me in my path. He gave me a little extra to …let’s just say… make thing a bit more challenging. I learned that I was 8 weeks pregnant, and that whoozy early mornings was actually morning sickness. Fear, frustration, and hopelessness filled my fighter soul. I frantically psyched myself, I MUST keep myself together. (kaya todo text and press release ako… hahaha) Then again God worked mysteriously to lift those negative emotions and thoughts. Friends were shocked but yet very much excited. Their reactions made me sigh in relief, gave me instant booze that I will never go solo flight in this challenge. A split second after sighing, a began to panic once again. How the hell will I put into words my situation and confess to my dad. After all his sacrifices, his dedication to raise us up as adults single handedly. I know this was one that I can never get away with, so with all courage I texted my oldest brother. He bombarded me with questions, no doubt he was shocked but amidst the anxiety that filled the both of us, for the first time in our entire life I felt that he truly cared for me as a little sister. Of course I was not spared from the sermon but more than that I was so grateful that I was able to tell someone inside the family and much better I was not rejected. Phew! I was never the person who plans ahead…actually I hated being bothered by things that are yet to come.. pondering on such things was a waste of time… I live my life one day at a time… I am grateful for the past and try with all my might to free myself from regrets and grudges… it’s the present that matters. All these were changed when I recognized my situation... i saw myself living des'ree's song... I gotta be bold.. i gotta be bad.. i gotta be wiser.. i gotta be hard.. i gotta be tough.. i gotta be stronger.. still gotta be cool.. gotta be calm.. and very much gotta stay together... who knows... Love might reallly save the day.. Life's a bitch.. but it aint gonna bitch a bitch around.. keepin it real!
8.11.06
this is why i have to write.
i
love
to
SLEEP
because
MY LiFE
has the
tendency
to
faLL aPart...
when
im
awake.
back in 2004 i started blogging (thanks to the influence of sarah and aiko). I could not access my older accounts so i stopped blogging until around november of last year when friendster had the blog thing feature.
I have always been fond of writing down my thoughts and sentiments, like a lot of people it's therapy for me. I just came to notice how I evolved from a free-spirited optimistic blogger to a balled-up bitch. I can only tell as far as how i dealt with the past 2 years of my life, there always been questions if i am the only one who got a tumble-down the dirt covered road, am i the only one who seems to be tired (but not really giving up) of the turns that our world has come to?
Just this very minute i realized WHY i write things down.
"There's No Bitchin a round a true blooded bitch" (there's no bitchin a true blue bitch around ---> rusty grammar) I have counted how manysunshines i missed and looked forward to at least witnessing more (if i happen to wake up that early) and still blissfully worshiping sunsets and moonlights....
For a time i have lost hope because i'm burned out. Work is getting to my head, that i have a blurry view of what i cna make out of my career since i have been trying to numb myself of my desires to do what i want to do. Another recollection, i control ME but HE controls my life.
Maybe.. just maybe when i get a breather ( a nice vacation... or a reward for dealing with the suckiest job--stull thankful im employed though) i can have me a sharper view of how I would make best of what and where i am now.
love
to
SLEEP
because
MY LiFE
has the
tendency
to
faLL aPart...
when
im
awake.
back in 2004 i started blogging (thanks to the influence of sarah and aiko). I could not access my older accounts so i stopped blogging until around november of last year when friendster had the blog thing feature.
I have always been fond of writing down my thoughts and sentiments, like a lot of people it's therapy for me. I just came to notice how I evolved from a free-spirited optimistic blogger to a balled-up bitch. I can only tell as far as how i dealt with the past 2 years of my life, there always been questions if i am the only one who got a tumble-down the dirt covered road, am i the only one who seems to be tired (but not really giving up) of the turns that our world has come to?
Just this very minute i realized WHY i write things down.
"There's No Bitchin a round a true blooded bitch" (there's no bitchin a true blue bitch around ---> rusty grammar) I have counted how manysunshines i missed and looked forward to at least witnessing more (if i happen to wake up that early) and still blissfully worshiping sunsets and moonlights....
For a time i have lost hope because i'm burned out. Work is getting to my head, that i have a blurry view of what i cna make out of my career since i have been trying to numb myself of my desires to do what i want to do. Another recollection, i control ME but HE controls my life.
Maybe.. just maybe when i get a breather ( a nice vacation... or a reward for dealing with the suckiest job--stull thankful im employed though) i can have me a sharper view of how I would make best of what and where i am now.
7.11.06
kapooootz
when you thought you got the hang of it.....
it turns spoiled rotten.
How come others are doing what they wanna do?
Why am i stuck with a job i'm trying to live up to with false principles?
call center shmenter shit BULLCRAP!!!
*because im helping out people*
ruin their lives!!!
while i ruin mine!!
God save me.
i want to teach. i want to heal.
give me a chance.
6.11.06
on rage and annoyance
sorry but i just cannot drop it.
he is messing up my cover and seems to have this unwavering habbit of ticking me off...
let's see if he would want to go on living another day if he pissess me off just one more time.
UR down to 6 asshole!! 1 more and and really iD make u live the life a dirtbag should be living!!!]
my virtual pets.
Since i am not so much of a pet person, except for cats of course... iL keep them here. where they can be checked on by me and anyone who bothers. Plus saves me the pet food and cleaning after pet litters.. hahahaha!
all my v.pets can rotate their heads anyway they...you like. not too much though .. you'll make them sick.
my panda has jaundis. too much bamboo. popo is named after my sister portia's panda stuffy. they were born 5 years apart but they came from the same mumu. well panda's are nice. they shut up all the time. great buddies. u should get one!
here's my golden turle Thumb. He likes shallow water. He drinks his bacth water, that's where he gets all his powers! he loves eating garden leaves, saluyot and makahiya for breakfast and yellow gumamela for snacks. he skips dinner because when the moon is up he just sleeps. don't talk to him about having a boring day, he'll break your neck.
This is Smoke. My kitty cat, not much action goin on with her virtually but you'll find her to be as wicked as her master. Mokey .. i love smokey! moke moke mokeeeeeeeeeee!
2.11.06
burned out.
Wasted moments.
stillness torments.
few thoughts, taunts you with success.
a baffled head, pushing me to egress.
Paralized, confused.
mind stuck in a muse.
thoughts in a perpetual loop.
head and soul preped for a coup.
being lost meaning
i'm giving up on dreaming.
frustration knocked out
hopes boxed out.
clock.
work.
stillness torments.
few thoughts, taunts you with success.
a baffled head, pushing me to egress.
Paralized, confused.
mind stuck in a muse.
thoughts in a perpetual loop.
head and soul preped for a coup.
being lost meaning
i'm giving up on dreaming.
frustration knocked out
hopes boxed out.
clock.
work.
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