Ruth..YOUR MOVE!

I am struggling to wrap my head around how i am to move forward.





So to further shake up my life, my family now knows of my troubled marriage. And as expected, very different from the pep talk you get from friends and strangers, they gave me blow-by-blow of how STUPID i lived my life for the past 8 years of not saying a word about my endeavor.


I have been selfish and proud..and overly LAZY to pick myself up and fix things for myself.


I am amazed by how i projected calm and collected when i am, for 8 years, have been poisoning myself and slowly ebbing away to a false pretense of a woman of virtue. I tell myself.."for my kids", this drives me more now than ever to fix myself or else i will never do things right when i stay broken.

I prayed for wisdom, and now i pray for diligence to follow through and get this done. I pray that i be reminded when my drive falters and i become lazy to finish this.

My God is a very systematic one, and we communicate quite well. He is done giving me epiphanies, it my turn to come back to me.