Unmoved.

I have several bunches of really great friends. I have been tripping on Alicia Keys' City Life intro because i love the way she delivered the prose but more than that it reminds me on how some people have the ability to hold me down and get me back to my steady self. To share these lyrics/prose with everyone, i wish my sista a happiest 26th year ahead. It's somewhat gloomy if you read it but really it talks of gaining enough stability to fight your own battles. Chaos is then defined to understand how to put order in this world. Embrace chaos and your life's troubles and don't let go of that itsy bitsy light of achieving ultimate happiness. Love you and you can trust me to keep you grounded as you did me. :p cheers cheers!

Here I am, Here We are
As it will go on forever
Noise, always noise
Candles burn, lights are low
I haven't a place to go

Life in it's in constant state of moving nowhere
The music is nice, floats through the air
Sounds of waves crashing everywhere
Percussive Submissions, mind conditions
Writing with the left hand
Unknowing and taking the chance

Why not fly? Why not try?
This constant game i play to stay high
But all is just a state of mind
All is reality of your choice
Constant evolution, constant adaptation
Constant state of moving nowhere

Footsteps, silence is loud
Kindness is brave, wisdom is long
Loving is necessary, i need it, we need it
Searching, looking for satisfaction
it is nowhere, it is everywhere

Preaching, pleading, praying for God to come
What are we waiting for?
Why are we so afraid of taking charge?
But it's always changing, always
In a constant state of moving nowhere

We all have demons to battle, roads to walk
Crosses to bear, mistakes and sins
Candles and their steady glow
Water in its constant crash

Endless horizon, rocks of time long gone
Still strong, still here and so are we
Here we are forever
In a constant state of moving nowhere.

boxed up.

What's the term to word one's capability to be influenced? vulnerability? errr does that cover the act of actually analysing and backing out and evading the actual influence?

On that note, i just remembered i'm supposed to blog about this type of situations before but never got the chance to remember to post one. I have noticed that i soak up on emotions when i'm around someone who's vastly immersed in an extreme state of emoteness.. hahaha. (hay language are of my brain has deteriorated.. i cannot be sober for so long!!!) and in the course of my professional life, this ability of getting drenched with someone else's emotions i could now say only has put me in this box where i want so much to relate but would not dare because i'm so much of a sissy to handle the complications. (sissiness is the result of stubborness and laziness to promote change big enough to ruin a mediocre routine of a life that you already have.. hehehe just so we're clear..)

What's the point of the blog then? uhmmm.. wla lang.. just wanted to share that i'm still stuck with no appropriate reaction to influences that puts my priorities at stake hence i have to blame myself for being a sissy to move on.. see the light that others saw... hehehe.. kelan kaya ako manenega and have a full-blast rampage of negativity? What can i do when that happens? for some reason all i could see are dark images of me gunning down all fugly people in front of me, and my quick-fix would be to treat anyone who witnessed it to a can of soda and a stick of yosi.. KALMAAAAAAAAA! hehehehe.. pasalamat na lang tayo sa Diyos na ginwa niya kong steady. *bow* thanks po!

anong oras ako nag post ng blog?! CHUCHU BEWARE

No time to listen to myself. i miss "senti" moments, when you have enough positivity at the end of the day and exhaust what's left of your day's energy making nilaynilay..writing...imagining...wishing..dreaming.weeks have been boring because its too busy to even stay focus. i have learned to cope with stuff and shut off emotions that i want to stay in one area of the day.say... work has always been tainted with marginal politicking, rants over incompetence and blind resignation to get things done and over with. i had a couple of events over the weekend with my officemates, twas a breather and dramatic. all negativity so long as it doesn't hit me directly is neutralized by the horsing around during breaks or when we get to send IMs to each other. I definitely belong to the group that stays evasive of the office issues but could supply reliable intelligence to whoever.. unbiased, well at least if we do take side, we take the lesser evil and more rational party. my family has been pretty fun past few weeks. finally had a chance to take andrea out to the mountains. where she painted walls and kissed the clouds. twas quite misty that weekend but fun all the same. my sista has been in touch, sista gi just a little.. missin her. Anne naman has managed to confuse me with his guy stories. they're interesting but confusing.
once again i have reached steadiness. i need a new drive to finally close deals that i really want to close. more importantly i'd like to seek for new devious ways to put people in their right places. so the world would be a quieter place to live in.
:p
labo lang..